New Mom Secret: I Hate Co-Sleeping

It's hard being a new mom (or even an experienced mom to a new baby) and sometimes we do things we know we shouldn't, despite what all the experts say. But this is a safe place to share your secrets (PM me)—we'll never tell.

This Week's Secret:


My son is 3 months old and I love being a mom and enjoy almost everything about him. But I hate sleeping with him in my bed. All of my friends co-sleep and I feel enormous pressure to do it. After all, I nurse and he is so little, but having him beside me means I get little to no sleep most nights because I am so afraid of hurting him or waking him up. My husband is also a big fan of the co-sleep and we always said we would, so why am I finding it so annoying? I feel awful, but I want to put the kid in a crib in his own room. — Anonymous

First, of course, you don't have to co-sleep. But then you know this. It's true that for many nursing moms, it's easier to co-sleep. But you can also do a hybrid like I did where you put your children down in their own bed and then only bring them in if they wake in the night.

Or you can just cut out co-sleeping altogether. Honestly. You don't have to give in to peer pressure to be a good mom. If it isn't feeling good to you, you shouldn't be doing it. You are his mom, no one else! It doesn't make you a bad mom to set limits, and besides, a poorly rested mama is far worse than one who is sleeping.

Do you have any advice for this mom?

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