Don't Diss Parents Just Because You Don't Have Kids!

News flash: Babies do not make us boring. And while that revelation may seem a shock to some, it seems many of us who are moms already know this. I mean, come on. Duh.

But someone needs to tell the writer from New York City who was interviewed by the New York Post in a piece about choosing the city over having babies.

Look, we all know those smug moms who will go on about how "empty" their lives were before kids and how they feel sorry for people without kids. They suck, too. But really, there is no excuse for what this writer said. See below:

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I realized I wanted to be a writer in New York City. That changed everything. I wanted a life that sparkled. I wanted a life that wasn't conventional. My sister, who’s two years younger, is married and has two kids. I just look at her life, and it’s really my worst nightmare.

Ouch.

It's easy from the outside looking in to be critical of parents. Many of us drive minivans with cracker crumbs on the seat and rotting bananas hidden away somewhere (or maybe that's just me). We don't get out nearly as much as our childless counterparts, and yes, our houses are probably somewhat messy.

But those things don't matter. We have kids. There is nothing, no life I would trade my exhausting, demanding, creative, and ridiculously fun children for. That sparkles to me. But fine, you don't want kids? Great. But to say our lives are your "worst nightmare"? Overcompensate much?

Most decent people who are also parents don't go around saying how sorry we feel for childless women. That wouldn't be polite. We all make our own choices. And children aren't for everyone. Fine. The rest of the piece made sense. We all make different choices, some people don't want kids. It's all very reasonable. But that one quote unnerved me.

Is it possible to have an "unconventional" life and still have kids? And then I laugh. I know people in open marriages raising children. I know poly-amorous families. I know gay fathers and lesbian mothers who have four kids each. I know divorced families, single moms, families who adopted their children from foreign countries, and families who pulled their children out of school to travel the world for two years.

All of us experience our children in different ways and all of us have different children. Some are calm. Some (like mine) aren't. Every day with them is an adventure, some good, some bad. We swim, we visit museums, we stomp in rain puddles and visit the firehouse.

Personally, I also manage to get to yoga several times a week, run marathons and half marathons, travel abroad a couple times a year, have creative date nights with the hubs, see a few movies a month, and have a rocking sex life.

Conventional? Not always. Awesome? For sure. Parenting may not shine with the same sparkle as the childless life. And hey, to each their own. But I wouldn't trade what I have now for what I could've had if I hadn't had them. If my child-full life sounds boring, don't have kids. But don't call me sparkle-less and I won't call you "empty", k?

Does this quote annoy you?

 

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