Give yourself a round of applause, attachment parenting mamas! The hard work you are doing is paying off. We have another study that says just how important bonding with your baby is -- oh, yeah, this one is pretty cool.
This study published in the Psychological Science studied subjects for two decades -- 20 years, folks -- to see how their attachment styles as infants affected their relationships later in life. Turns out, the stronger bond a person had with her mother as an infant, the better she was able to resolve conflicts in her relationships as a young adult.
That's big guns. That's huge. But I'm not surprised.
Yes, there's a lot of definitions flying around of what attachment parenting is, the proper rules of attachment parenting, and so on. I really like what Michele, fellow blogger here at The Stir, wrote: "Many parents practice Attachment Parenting long before they find out that it's been given a name, if they ever do."
She's right. Think of it this way: the bonding you are doing with that baby, the breastfeeding, the babywearing -- that is all attachment parenting. Talking to her about random things throughout the day, responding to her cries quickly, keeping her close to you -- that's all under the attachment parenting umbrella, too.
I call it gettin' in the groove with your kiddo. Here is this little person who you will have a lifelong relationship with -- lifelong is, well, a long time. Relationships of any kind take work, they take time spent together, they take constant nurturing. I like to think that, at the heart of it, attachment parenting is about respect. With attachment parenting, you are treating your child with respect. By doing this, you establish the foundation of the strong relationship, you establish your bond with each other. That's what we want, right? A strong bond? You betcha.
Of course, attachment parenting goes beyond the first year of your kiddo's life -- it's how you interact with your child as she grows. Again, it's respecting her, paying attention to her cues, and providing her with choices rather than rules so she becomes independent and confident in her ability to travel through this world.
So, the results of this study make total sense to me. With attachment parenting, we're teaching our kids how to have good, trusting, stable relationships. Doesn't surprise me that then those babies with strong bonds grow up and handle relationship conflicts, the bumps in the road, in a healthier way than those that didn't have that example.
Nope, this study doesn't surprise me. It energizes me. It give me that little pat on the back that what I'm doing with my kiddo -- which isn't always the easiest or most popular (I'm talking to you, Tiger Mom) -- is all worth it. Let's all feel good about it.
How do you feel about attachment parenting?
Image via LisaW123/Flickr
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Comments 41
evidently ive done "ap" for all these years thru 5 babies and had no clue it had a name its just boding and being a good mama in my mind!!
good article, we can twist the opposite any way we want and blame labeling and claim there are other ways to bond but this has been proven to be BEST
Obviously - as other posters stated - the author completely misconceptualized the study and created a biased piece of material out of something it wasn't. Articles like this are the reason moms begin to bash other moms for parenting choices. Take this into account for example: Alot of new moms turn to resources like the internet and cafemom for information about pregnancy and parenting. If a first time mom who is already emotional and well lets face it - as it goes on we get a little more scared because we have no idea what we are doing - this is the first baby after all. Then we start looking at things like this. Well a study that was done and published in a professional journal. It must be true. So I am going to do this because science says its best for me and my baby. So they develop the same attitude the author has. After all of the influencing from the article the attitude is adopted - did I forget to mention that mom bashing slam at the end directed toward another user? Well since the author is obviously prominent enough to have a featured article and citing studies done - they must know what they are doing and it is appropriate to publicly slam others for not agreeing with you.
cont.
Really? Is this really the environment we want as moms? Food for thought.
And author: not citing your articles other than by name only makes you look shady when it comes to professional documents like that. If you want your information easily absorbed make it easier for the reader to verify - they shouldn't have to call the writers to get a copy of the study to verify your information. That's just lazy.
yes yes yes! very much agreed!!! thank you!
Not surpised at all. I don't think parents even need to be ardent practioners of AP, just follow their instint and follow their child.
i like it, but I would like to be able to use the bathroom or take a shower in peace!
Yea, I have a 2 1/2 yr!