If Classes Were Taught By Babies ...

Amy Keyishian
1

Baby Back to School
Professor Baby will school you.

It’s September, and everyone’s talking about going back to school! Stores are having sales … my friends are obsessing over homework … even the Glee kids are back at (on) their desks. I feel so left out, what with the newborn and the toddler not being academically ready!

I know, I know -- we’re so behind. I should have gotten those intrauterine flash cards!

But it occurs to me that while neither of my kids are signing up for classes, they could sure teach people a thing or two. That’s right, my intelligent and brilliant daughters should follow in their grandparents’ footsteps and teach! Ready to sign up? Here’s the Baby U Course Listing:

BRF -- Beginner Spit-up: Hork and Horkability
PEW -- Diaper Filling: When, How, and Why
YAY -- Introduction to Naked Time
EEK -- Advanced Tantrum: Somebody’s Got to Do It
AWW -- Studies in Cute: From Eyelashes to Two-Eyed Winking
DUH -- Math: How Many Is This Many?
MUS -- Music Time: Again! Again! AGAIN!!!
ZZZ -- Sleepy Time: It Ends at Dawn
RED -- Studies in Heroism: Elmo, Elmo, Elmo
TIT -- Breastfeeding Symposium: Exposing Mommy’s Nipple
DOH -- Climbing Seminar: Finding the Most Rickety Chair
WAH -- Your Health: Owies Hurt and Are Bad
GRN -- Critical and Theoretical Perspectives on Boogers
BUB -- Special Project in Bath Splashing

What class could your kids teach? Tell us in the comments!

Image via Phil Scoville/Flickr


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