'Teen Mom' Recap: Ooops, Farrah Did It Again

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Is Farrah a bad mama?
Just when I was lulled into thinking, "Man, I can really relate to these poor, exhausted, overworked teen mamas," I've gone careening in the other direction.

Because all I kept thinking during the fifth episode of MTV's Teen Mom yesterday was, "What the hell are they thinking?"


Will somebody call DYFS already? Because Farrah, for like the fifth episode in a row, has let poor little baby Sophia get injured while she's right there, being completely self-involved and neglectful. It doesn't seem like she means to do it. And you can give her the first or second or maybe even third time. But c'mon, this is getting truly ridiculous.

This week, a crying baby Sophia tumbles off the bed while her mama is dealing with the fact that she's just screwed herself out of $3,000 -- falling for an online "wire the funds" scam while selling her car so she and little Sophia can get a new car with "a sun roof and power door locks."

How many things are wrong with that sentence? Let's go over this carefully, Farrah. You're 18. You're single. You're cut off from your family. You have a 1-year-old. You're in school. You're low on funds but have to pay for your apartment, for diapers, for food, for school, and for all those millions of other little things that add up when you're not paying attention. Should a new car with a sun roof and power door locks be on the top of your list? No! Under no circumstances should that be where your money is going. Just so we're clear.

But then again, sometimes it's hard to remember that these kids are, after all, just kids. She's 18, she's on her own for the first time, and she still doesn't quite get how much work a baby is. How much attention they really need. All I have to say, though, is poor baby Sophia. She's gonna have some scars to show off down the line. And also -- why aren't the cameramen looking out for the kid just a little bit? Do we really have to witness her burning her hand or falling down or being abandoned in a dark room by her mom while she cries? It's horrible.

But Farrah's not the only one with a mess on her hands. Amber -- who forced Gary to propose to her on the beach in Florida last week -- is ready to call the whole thing off this week, when she starts fighting with Gary's step-dad and mom over wedding details.  Apparently, the two families don't get along. And so she and Gary have another one of their massive blowouts. But in the end, they make up, because poor Gary just can't let go. He lets her humiliate him every time -- this week donning that silly bunny rabbit costume and dancing around like an overgrown oaf. You know that was all Amber's idea. (Especially considering it would probably have been so much cheaper to just take Leah to have a photo taken with the Easter Bunny at the mall than buying a costume made to fit Gary.) Next week, no doubt, they'll be fighting all over again. Meanwhile, poor baby Leah is living in filth -- did you see that tub? -- with two screaming teens. Lovely.

Catelynn and Tyler are doing the whole on-the-verge of breaking up thing, despite the counseling. He simply doesn't trust her -- and wants to see her phone records to see if she's been lying to him. And he's really mean about it. But eventually, Tyler's mom knocks some sense into him, and he stops being a little bitch to Catelynn. At least for now.

The only teen mama who seems to be making sense of things lately is Maci. This week, she introduces baby Bentley to her new beau, Kyle. But she does this after having several conversations with the seemingly level-leaded Kyle about what dating a woman with a kid really entails. She's part of a package deal. Kyle seems to get that. Maybe he's in it for the long haul?

I gotta say, the drama's got me hooked. But like my husband pointed out -- yes, he's watching with me -- these mamas really make it seem like all teen moms are bad moms. Which I know isn't true. I wonder how these ladies feel watching their angst-y ups-and-downs play out like this on TV -- do the edits cut like a knife?

Do you think Farrah's a bad mom?

Images via MTV

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