Flickr photo by ganesha.isisA couple of weeks ago, I dished on the great co-sleeping debate going on between my husband and I. He wants our twins to move into their own room and I would like our 4-month-olds to stay in the co-sleeper next to our bed for a yet-to-be determined amount of time.
No doors were slammed during this quiet argument, but we did go to bed mad and didn't really talk much the next morning as we both got ready to leave for work.
Later that night, we talked.
He explained that what made him the most upset was that I couldn't tell him when I wanted the kids to move out of our room. He is a man of exactness, always punctual -- if not early -- and works off a precise schedule in just about everything he does in life. (It's not as annoying as it sounds.)
We both agreed to read our opposing chapters on co-sleeping in the books we love and revisit the conversation after that.
As we all know, marriage is all about compromise and even The Attachment Parenting Book by Dr. Sears (the philosophy I feel strongly about) says that both parents must agree on co-sleeping. And that is so true. If hubs is not happy about all of us in the same room, then that negative energy will permeate the air and we'll all have nightmares.
Yes, I believe in this hippie dippy kind of stuff.
We read the books, even read all of your comments on the first post -- yes, even my husband -- and we talked. Calmly.
We chatted about how we are both working parents and we both cherish the time we spend at home with the babies. He told me how proud he is of me for tandem breastfeeding twins, pumping at work, and wanting to continue as long as I can. I told him how great a father he is and how I love to watch him read in that silly voice to the kids.
It was a good talk.
But we are just on opposite sides of the co-sleeping debate.
He wants them to move into their room soon because he believes the transition will be easier now than when they are older. It didn't help that when we went to the pediatrician the other day and he asked her about when she thought they should sleep in their own room, she responded, "If you wait until after 6 months, it will be harder because they start to form habits by then."
Thanks a lot, doctor!
And then my man got all romantical. Well, sexual. As some of you thought, he misses the sweet lovin' our bedroom used to see.
So this is what we agreed on -- at 5 1/2 months, we're going to try putting the twins to bed in their own room for one night (on the weekend when neither of us have to get up early for work the next day). We'll see how it goes and talk about it more after that.
In the meantime, I've got to get our sexy groove thing back. I'm hoping if I up the ante in the lovemaking department, he won't see the babies as roadblocks in our bump n' grind. And the co-sleeping can continue.