When should I share the news that I'm pregnant? Early Pregnancy


Couple's hands holding baby shoes.
Should you spread the news right away or keep it a secret for a bit? Consider these opinions when deciding when to tell the world you're expecting.

Wait for the Heartbeat

"I'm sort of old-fashioned. Although I think a partner should know very early, I'm not into telling the world you're pregnant until you have a good looking ultrasound with a good heartbeat -- or, if you don't have an ultrasound, hearing the heartbeat with a fetal doppler. If something like a miscarriage were to happen, it would put a lot of pressure on you to talk with a lot of people about it." -- Mary Jane Minkin, MD, clinical professor of obstetrics, gynecology, and reproductive sciences at Yale University, New Haven, CT

It's Okay to Tell Family Early

"We waited to share the news during my first two pregnancies and then, when we miscarried, it was even harder because I felt like I had no one to talk to about it. With this baby, as soon as we got the first ultrasound and confirmed he or she was in there and doing well, we told our families."

Tell People at Different Times

"We told my parents at five weeks and waited until the first ultrasound three weeks later to tell our daughter. We haven't announced it to others yet, but I'm glad we told my parents when we did. If we'd lost the baby, we would have [had] them for support."

It's Hard to Keep the Secret

"I nearly fainted at church, and I could tell people were wondering. I would like to wait to tell the rest of my friends and family until eight to 10 weeks, but I don't know if the secret will keep that long!"

Share During the Second Trimester

"The general rule of thumb is to wait until the second trimester to spread the news, but everyone is different. Don't tell anyone you wouldn't tell if you had a miscarriage."

When You're Showing

"I told my close family and friends pretty early, but I waited to tell people at work until I was just starting to 'show.'"

The advice on CafeMom aims to educate, inform, and provide a range of solutions to the issues moms care about. It is not a substitute for consultation with a medical professional or treatment for a specific condition. You should not use this information to diagnose or treat a health problem without consulting a qualified professional. Please contact your health-care provider with questions and concerns.